Things I Learnt From ❤️ Love

It’s such an abstract concept at times, but Love has powerfully changed me in so many concrete ways, especially over the past 6 and a half years. It’s taught me things I thought I might never fully understand and it’s helped me on my way to becoming more of the person I’ve always wanted to be.

A tight, loving bear hug can sometimes be the best response.

Earlier this year, I was very unhappy. There was one day in particular where I just sat down on bed and cried, working myself up into a pitiful state at the thought of going to work the next day. I wanted a change (which I eventually got) and I felt incredibly trapped. There wasn’t much he could do or say, but he came home and sat down on the bed with me and just hugged me.
As I cried into his shoulder, I realised it was one of those moments when really all I needed was a hug from someone who loved me. One bear hug from him and it felt like all my pieces were coming back together. The work situation still sucked, but I was happy to be there with him, to feel so incredibly loved, and I knew that love would help me get to a place where I was much happier.

The right one will always, always bring you up, not down.  

I’ve had only a couple of relationships but I can’t say that they all left me feeling as if I was a wonderful person. In fact, some of the people I’d been with in the past made me feel as if I was worthless, pointless, useless. One made me feel as if I could do no right and that whatever I did would probably result in a big mess of mistakes (which may or may not have been true at the time…). Now I see that the right person, the best person, will always bring you up.
No matter what you love to do, the right person for you will be supportive of it. They don’t have to do it too, they don’t even have to understand it sometimes, but they will always loving and respectfully support you. They will bring you up as high as they can and never will they try to push you down.
You can change more than you realise when you are in love.
Personally, I’m of the mindset that you shouldn’t have to change a great deal for someone you love (otherwise they aren’t loving you for you). Love is about acceptance and, therefore, the person who loves you most should accept you for who you are. However, love is also about compromise, which means you do have to be open to changing some things in order to coexist in a relationship with someone you love, especially when you live with them.
The thing I’ve found with love is that you won’t mind changing nearly as much as you might have thought when it comes to doing it for someone you care about (and someone who is also making an effort to change for you too). Love, real love, really is about compromising and meeting the other person half-way and I’ve learned that, much to my surprise, it’s a lot easier to change when you want to do it for the sake of someone who means the world to you.
Love will inspire you, will make you believe you can do anything. 

Deep down I’ve always had a sparkling belief that I could do anything I wanted to do. And generally speaking, I’ve done a pretty good job of surrounding myself with people who believe in me. But nothing is quite as inspiring as love and someone who loves you and believes in you.
I know it sounds cheesy but the right kind of honest, true love will make you realise you really can do what you want to do with your life, and that you, and only you, have the ability to transform your world and turn your dreams into realities. Before I met him, I believed, but after I met him I started to take serious action. Coincidence? Perhaps. Or maybe it’s the amazing power of love and it’s ability to transform not only the way we see the world, but the way we see ourselves.
You don’t need grand gestures to show you care.
When you feel as if you love someone so much you could just squeeze him (or her), it can be hard to hold back on grandiose expressions of love. But I have learnt that love doesn’t have to be some excessive, expensive display. Expressions of love come in all shapes and sizes.
Of course, big grand gestures are nice, but some of the most loving things I have experienced don’t have to do with grandness, but instead have to do with him going out of his way to make me happy. Sometimes something small, doing the chores I normally do on top of his, can mean more than the most lavish gift in the world. If I were given the choice between a million small acts of kindness or one grand gesture, I would take the kindness every single time. That, to me, is true love.
Don’t be afraid to open up your heart, even if you’re scared. 

This has been the hardest, and yet the best, lesson for me to learn. In the past, I’ve opened up my heart, but it’s always been hesitantly, with great care, and always holding just a little bit more in than I should. It was with him that I finally felt loved to a degree in which I could fully and completely open up my heart and let him in.
To tell you the truth, this was terrifying for me. I always liked to keep other people at an arm’s length and to pull someone close to me was an act I was unfamiliar with. Despite my fear, the choice to let him close to me has been extremely rewarding, leading me to feel things and share things I never thought I would. Love is amazing in that way; it can inspire us to let go of our fears and fall headfirst into the parts of ourselves that scare us the most.

Leah is people powered! She is a woman on a mission to Encourage, Support and Inspire you as she writes. Her passion lies in topics relating to Mental Health, Women Empowerment, Self Care and Self Love.
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